Dysfunctional Wednesday!

Michael: Mom, do you have any books I can bring into my class?
Me: Books? What kind of books?
Michael: The ones you wrote.
Me: You mean one of the children's books....I have a copy of that if you want to bring it in.
Michael: No! The genie story one. Do you have a copy of that?
Me: Yes.....but there's sex in that book. You can't bring that to school.
Michael: Yeah, yeah, yeah.....that doesn't matter. We are going to do a project on it.

Ya, I bet they are!

Juliusism Sunday!

Julius:  I had to hold my sleep in last night.

Me:  What do you mean hold your sleep in?

Julius:  Cuz, Isaiah said if I fell asleep first....he was going to climb into your bed and go to sleep.

Me:  He may have tried, but he wouldn't have.

Julius:  Good. I got too tired and fell asleep. 

Dysfunctional Wednesday!

As Julius and Isaiah were getting out of the tub last night I overheard this conversation. Isaiah is holding the bathroom door with Julius on the other side.
 
Julius: Isaiah, open the door!!!
Isaiah: No!
Julius: Open the door now!!!
Isaiah: Not until you answer me. Did you spit on me in the tub?
Julius: You don't need to know!

LOL! That's a yes! Apparently, Julius had soap in his mouth...that's his story and he's sticking to it!

Juliusism Sunday!

 Bacon...It's For Breakfast!

Julius (at breakfast): I got the jacked up for squat bacon.

*Four older boys looked at him*

DeAnthony: What are you talking about?

Julius: Duh....my bacon, its burnt. It's jacked up for squat!!!

Dysfunctional Wednesday!

Travel Back In Time

Me: Oh, Gracie! Nonna got an American Girl Doll catalog in the mail and I meant to bring it to you. I thought you'd like to look through it.
Gracie: Oh my God! I want an American Girl Doll so bad!
Me: You can't get one of those...there over a $100 and you don't take care of your toys.
Gracie: Seriously, though! I want Kaya!
Me: Well, have you ever heard of paper dolls? We'll cut Kaya out of the magazine and you can play....you can even cut out all the accessories!
Gracie: *Rolls eyes*

Geez, did she look like her mother when she did that!

Juliusism Sunday!

Julius:  You know...I'm not afraid of ghost.
Mom:  You aren't?
Julius:  Nope, why should I be. If they come to your door....you just close it.
Mom:  Can't they just walk through it.....they're ghost?
Julius:  Never mind.  I was thinking of Frankenstein. 

Dysfunctional Wednesday!

He Likes Me, He......Nope, He Doesn't!

I was meeting up with my daughter in the parking lot at Sheetz, when the really cute clerk started waving to me from inside. Turns out....he was only washing the windows

Juliusism Sunday!

Julius: Mom, there's a guy living in my head and he comes up with some great ideas.
Me: What kind of ideas?
Julius: Like skateboarding off a helicopter.
Me: Don't listen to that voice.

Dysfunctional Wednesday!

My hubby is a no nonsense kind of guy. He doesn't talk much, but he asked me a question this morning in the car. The question was so minute, that I can't even remember what he asked. So I answered him. After a fifteen minute story I said, "So....I guess the answer is yes." He just nodded. I give him a fantastical answer.....and I get a flipping nod! I've come to the conclusion that we are a lot like Phil and Ms. Kay from Duck Dynasty (minus the stewed squirrels and fried frogs) when it comes to talking to one another. I talk and he just gives a nod or a "yup" The only difference is, unlike Ms. Kay.....I always end my chatter with "Are you freaking listening to me?!"