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Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Two Nuts and a Bolt!



       Michael Searles is trying to fix the basketball hoop in front of the house. It needs new bolts, so we drive to Lowe's Home Improvement.  Devan has told a SUV full of his brothers that he has the bolts in his pocket, so they can match them up. 

       Michael and Devan go into the store, find the right aisle, get an associate and Michael says, "Devan, give me one of the old bolts." Devan Searles, pulls out a single nut. Michael can only stand there and shake his head, and says Devan! That's a nut, not a bolt" Devan says "Oh, I didn't know there was a difference."
 

Sunday, July 28, 2013

Juliusism Sunday!!!


Julius wakes up at 1:30a.m. and waltzes into my room, and I'm still up writing.

Julius: Can I sleep in your bed?

Me: You really need to sleep in your own bed.

Julius: You know if you just say yes now, this will go a lot quicker!

*caves in*

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

It's Magic

Upstairs in the laundry room.
Me: Why is there a long screw on the floor and what does it go too?
DeAnthony: It came out of the coffee table downstairs.
Me:  So you guys replaced the screw?
DeAnthony: No.  There is another one just like it downstairs on the table.
Me: Okkkaaayyy.....so how in the world is that table still standing.
DeAnthony(shrugs shoulders): I don't know.

It's like the Twilight Zone!

Sunday, July 21, 2013

Juliusism Sunday!

Julius and Isaiah walk in the house, as soon as the sunset. They had been having a water fight with the neighborhood kids.
 
Isaiah(my complainer): I'm totally soaking wet. I told them I didn't want to get wet anymore, but no one listened. Now I'm miserable.
 
Me: *Look over at Julius for his report*
 
Julius: Hey, I just go with the flow!

LOL! He cracks me up! I love 6 year old boys!!

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Word's of Wisdom

Isaiah: The other night at Braxton's house Julius was playing with the campfire and burnt me by accident.
Me: Well, you or your brother shouldn't be playing with fire.
Isaiah: We were making torches, so we could hunt zombies
Me: I think the key words here are "never play with fire"
Isaiah: Actually, the key word is "accident"
Me: Ummm.....nope, not buying it! Go ask your father what happens to little boys who play with fire.
Isaiah: Daddy, what happens to boys who play with fire?
Paul: They pee their beds!
 
Ironically, Julius had an accident the next day, so it was very convincing :)
 
This is the words of wisdom my Father-In-Law instilled in all his grandkids, except for the five youngest, becasue he passed away a week before Isaiah was born. However, when he said it....the kids all believed it!

Sunday, July 14, 2013

Juliusism Sunday: Songwriter in the Making!

Julius: I made a new song to sing to Isaiah. Want to hear it?
Me: Awww, that's sweet. Of course, I do! Let's hear it!
Julius: Tattletale, Tattletale, you are a Fattatale! See it rhymes.
Me: *Lifts a quizzical eyebrow*

Friday, July 12, 2013

Ding, Ding, Ding! We Have A Winner!

Isaiah's whining again! I need one of those intercom systems they have at the airport, that says "This is a no Whine Zone. All violators will be towed away."
 
Isaiah: I'm so boreddddddddd!!!!!
 
Me(after several suggestions): How about we have a nose picking contest?
 
Isaiah: That's disgusting!
 
Julius: I think we should do it!!
 
Bahahahahaha!!! Love him......but not enough to have that kind of contest!

Sunday, July 7, 2013

Reap What You Sow!

Julius turned 6 years old on March 29th, and we are seeing some new phases in our little cherub turned imp!  The biggest issue "fresh" mouth!  Of course, having older siblings will aid in that issue, but for the most part its always been a big "no-no" in this family.  I know I have a tendency to be mildly sarcastic at times.......no comments from the peanut gallery on that one! ;)  However, we always use our pleases and thank you's to set the example!

Julius:  Get me a drink.
Me: That's not the way we ask for something Julius.
Julius: Fine.  Get me a drink, please.
I get the drink and stand there waiting for him to take it.
Julius:  Just put it over there. (pointing to the table)
Me: Julius.  I do not appreciate the way you are talking to me.  You need to use your manners.  So what is the magic word your suppose be using.
Julius: Abracadabra!
Me(counting to 10): No....that's not it.
Julius: Magic Johnson!
Me(turning around to return his drink to the fridge.....and now counting to 20)
Julius: Okay. Please.
Me: Much better, thank you.

I will be doing much research on 6 year old boys and their behavior!!!  Just another test of motherhood!!

Friday, July 5, 2013

Limitless Talent

Jenna: Mom, I went to a Mary Kay event last night and I won a $50 gift certificate for being the best dressed consultant, and I won some gold bangles and a pair of earrings for having the best "Diva Shoes"

*She has a shoe fetish, so I can attest to that*

Mom: Well, that's awesome!
Isaiah: You were on Mary Kay's Got Talent?! Wow!